catdogfandomcom-20200214-history
The End/Transcript
(While Dog is tossing peanuts) Cat: Ah...space. It's so...spacious. Dog: Ah, the peanut, nuttiest of all nuts. Cat: Quiet, Dog. Could you stop throwing those peanuts all over the place? I'm trying to admire some heavenly bodies. Dog: Wow! You can see the beach with that thing? Let me look! Cat: Hey, be careful with Winslow's new telescope that i'm using without his permission. Dog: Sorry. Wowie kaboodles! I can see a star, and another star, and a big black cloud that looks like a skull with scary teeth, and another star. Cat: Give me that. (Cat takes the telescope away from Dog) Cat: It must be a sign. An omen. Quick, we must consult Nostradummy's big book of predictions. Nostradummy made predictions thousands of years ago. Nostradummy: I predict that mountains will fly, trees will speak japanese and a cat and dog will be joined as one. Cat: Well, one out of every three of his predictions came true. Tree: Konnichi wa, CatDog-San. Dog: Make that two out of three. Cat: All right, let's see--cartoons, clampet, clouds, clouds! A black cloud in the shape of a skull with scary teeth means the rain to end all rains. Dog: Oh, no. Cat: One hour after the death cloud is sighted, the sky shall open, and the waters of doom shall cover the earth. Oh, why does it have to be water? (Dog picks up hour glass) Dog: Cat, Cat, what are we going to do?! Cat: Find a really big umbrella? Dog: No, we've got to warn everybody. Eddie: Throw another strike, come on, put some english on it. Cliff, you're the best! You're the king! You're the champ! You got the form. (Eddie is interrupted by Cliff shoving a bowling ball in his mouth) Cliff: Silence! I need total concentration if i'm going to win yet another league championship. (CatDog ride in on their bike) Dog: Everybody! Cliff: Huh? Eddie: No one could pick up that spare! The seven-ten split is an impossible shot! (Everyone cheering) Cliff: (growling) CatButt! Dog: The rain to end all rains is coming! Cat: No, really the end is near! Cliff: No, the end is here! At least for youse two. Oh, it's your fault i'm stuck with an impossible seven-ten split. Cat: No, look we're serious we saw a sign in the sky. (Dog pulls book out of Cat's mouth) Dog: And we read about it in Nostradummy's big book of predictions. The world is coming to an end. Shriek: That's the stupidest thing i ever heard. It's a bunch of baloney! (Lube picks up a bowling ball) Cliff: Lube, what are you doing? You'll blow the championship! Don't! Lube: Don't worry, Cliff, I just making it all warmy for you. Mr. Sunshine: Ducking, ducking. Lube: Duh... Touchdown! (Everyone panicking) Shriek: He picked up the seven-ten split! CatDog's right, it is a sign! Cliff: Duh...the end is near! Rancid: Leaping apocalypse! Mervis: I'm too young to die! Randolph: I'm too handsome to die! (Everyone screaming and panicking) Cat: Lube, don't panic! Cliff: He's not panicking, he does that every wednesday night. Dog: We only have 45 minutes to live! Cat: (Whistles to get everyone's attention) I have a plan, we don't have much time and we need to cooperate. But it just might be crazy enough to work. (Back at CatDog's house) Cat: Come on! All right, Dog, now me and you. Mervis: I'm afraid! Dunlap: I'm more afraid! Mervis: I wet my pants. Dunglap: You win. Cat: Keep working! Dog: But Cat, sand is running out. We'll never make it! Cat: Get ahold of yourself Dog, we're almost there! Cliff: Come on, work faster--hurry! Dog: Hi ho diggety! Cat was right! Three cheers for Cat! Everyone: Hip, hip, hooray! Cat: Stop, stop, stop! We only have time for one cheer, but thanks for the thought. Behold our ark! Fellow nearburgians--we're saved! (all gasping into house burnt down) We're doomed. Cat: Oh, Dog, Dog, soon we'll be drowning like rats! I wish Winslow was here. Dog: You miss him? Cat: No, I'd like to see him drown like a rat. Dunglap: Mervis, remember when your bike got busted and you didn't know who did it? It was me. I'm sorry. Mervis: Ah, that's okay. Remember when I lost your baseball glove? I ate it. Cliff: I gots to tell you something, Lube. My real name ain't cliff, it's... Clifford. Lube: Duh...my name isn't Lube, it's... uh. (Cliff gives Lube a wedgie, and it says "Ignatius" on the back of Lube's underwear) Cliff: Ignatius! Shriek: Psst. Hey, Dog. We...we ain't got much time, so, uh...kind of, uh... What the heck? I love you! (Shriek kisses Dog) (Dog faints) Cat: Um, Shriek? Shriek: What do you want, tuna breath? Cat: Well, uh, the end is near, so, Shriek, I...oh, what the heck. (Cat spins Shriek) Cat: I love you! (Cat kisses Shriek) (Shriek hits Cat with a tornado-like hit) Cat: Okay, well at least i got that off my chest. (Car honking and approaching) Winslow: Hey, what's the ruckus? Dog: Cat saw the end of the world through your telescope. Winslow: I told you to stay away from that thing! Cat: Winslow, we've only got five seconds left! Winslow: Let me see. Yikes! It's worse than I thought! Cat: What could be worse than the end of the world? Winslow: This peanut shell almost scratched my telescope. Rancid: Three, two, one, zero! Randolph: Did somebody saw peanut shell? Winslow: Here's your end of the world! Cat: No waters of doom! No destruction! We're going to live! Oh, happy day! Everything is beautiful! Mervis: So, you broke my bike you big liar. Dunglap: Cough up the glove, pig! Cliff: Ignatius, Ignatius, Lube's name is Ignatius. Lube: Lube's name is Ignatius, Lube's name is... Hey, I'm doing something wrong thinking. Shriek: If you say one word I'll pound you from here till tomorrow! (Dog zips up his mouth) Shriek: And as for you, lover boy. Cat: What? I was just kidding! It was a joke! I was just trying to lighten the mood. Come on, wait, no! Dog: Cat? Cat: What? Dog: Did Nostradummy say anything about a giant cloud shaped like an elephant riding a unicycle? (The gray cloud shapes into the form of Nostradummy's face in front of the moon, laughs and then smiles) Category:Episode transcripts